Wednesday, April 6, 2011

day #17

FUTURE SPOUSE

In 2007, my mom and I had TONS of long hard discussions, about how to piece myself back together.  This list was the outcome of one of those conversations.  It's no secret, I want a family, someday.  I'm in NO HURRY whatsoever... but it is certainly something I want for my life.  And an important part of getting there, is knowing what I want.  Over time the list gets refined and tweaked, and with each relationship I learn something new about myself.  That's the best part of the journey, discovering things you never knew about yourself.

1.  OLD SCHOOL COURTESY:  I may be a successful modern woman, but I'm quite old fashioned.  I swoom easily for guys that are gentlemen.  Opening a door for me, pulling out a chair for me, just the little simple things.  I've always loved cooking and cleaning (not kidding) and part of how I show my love for someone, is when I get to take care of them.  But I know this goes both ways, and a guy can take care of me, by doing these little simple things. 

2.  OKLAHOMA ROOTS:  I love to travel.  I enjoy living in a small town, but I also adore visiting big cities.  I don't care where I live, but I want to have the freedom to come back and visit my family in Oklahoma anytime.  (So living in NYC, or Africa, really doesn't seem like something I want to do!)  Being with someone who also has family in Oklahoma, or who wants to live in Oklahoma, would be ideal.

3.  INTELLIGENCE:  I'm one of those nerdy girls that finds intelligence fiercely sexy.  I need to be with someone that challenges me.  I've always said I'm attracted to people who are as smart or smarter than me.  I want to be able to have discussion about politics, current events, work challenges, relationship issues, religion/spirituality, etc.  Stimulate my brain!

4.   PASSION:  When I first created this list, #4 was JOB related... you must love your job, or something like that.  The more I thought about it, the more I realized a lot of people aren't crazy about their jobs, but that's NOT a deal breaker.  For me, I just want to be with someone that is passionate about SOMETHING.  It can be their job (like it is for me) or it can be something totally different.  The church they're involved with, their family, some organization they are a part of, etc.  I just love seeing people passionate about life.

5.  CANNOT BE OBSESSED WITH ANY ONE THING, ME INCLUDED:  You may have giggled at this one, but it just might be the most important thing on the list.  I've dated people who were obsessed with me.  I had absolutely no life of my own, and I cannot handle that.  I refuse to lose myself in order to date a guy. I am a stubborn, independent girl, and I need more alone time than anyone I know.  I've also dated people who are obsessed about something else, like OU football.  I know, I know, you're all thinking I'm obsessed with the Yankees.  I do LOVE the Yankees, and baseball in general, but I don't plan my life around their schedule.  It's just a game.

So there ya have it.  Not anything new, if you've read this before.  For me, for now, I'm happy doing my own thing... figuring out my life and where it stands right now.  I am blessed with such a FUN job, working with a board and numerous committees that I LOVE.  I'm in this amazing little town where everyone is so nice, and it's really beginning to feel like HOME.  I'm buiding really great friendships through the play that I hope will last long after the play is over.  When the play IS over, I'll have more time to travel to OKC to see my family... my parents, my sister, my niece and nephew who I miss so much.  Yeah, I get worked up every now and then about little things that stress me out (more on that tomorrow!) but when I step back and look at the big picture, the truth is, I am one BLESSED girl.  I couldn't ask for anything more than everything I have right now. 

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